A DAY IN THE LIFE OF...

So, by way of contrast, and to offer Jon a glimpse of what life is like with two small kids, here goes...
2-3am: Get up. Feed Nathan. Put him down. Pick him back up again. Feed him again. Put him down again. Wait for him to cry. Pick him back up again. (ad lib to fade).
4am: Go back to bed. Lie awake, waiting for Nathan to cry again. Consider legitimate ways of getting Nathan to sleep.
5am: As 2-3am, except Katie gets up this time. Consider ways of getting Nathan to sleep.
7am: Sam wakes up. Punctually. Sam's decision is final and no negotiation with parents will be entered into. Bangs on door designed to wake anyone from the deepest slumber. Simon gets up. Feels like he's just had a hard night clubbing. Except without the clubbing.
8am: Breakfast - ours, conventionally, is eaten, whilst Sam generously feeds the carpet. Nathan sleeps blissfully.
9am: Go to work. Well alright, 9.30am.
9am-5pm: Simon works. Well alright, "works". Katie really does some work. Sam goes to playgroup / childminder / park. Nathan sleeps and feeds.
6pm: Simon gets home. Plays football / hide-and-seek / dancing with Sam. Sam has tea. Carpet well-fed.
6-7pm: Simon baths Sam. Katie baths Nathan. Boys put to bed.
7pm: As 2-3am.
8pm: As 2-3am, with the 5am considerations.
9pm: Katie cooks tea, whilst Simon collapses pathetically in front of TV. Eat tea. Fall asleep. Go to bed.
10-11pm: As 2-3am.

Next episode: What happens at weekends.

And you thought Stephen's film reviews were a treat...

Yes, inspired by my friend Stephen's blog which enthralls us with tales of his adventures in Australia, I decided to set up a rival blog to enthrall you with the adventures of the Brown family in, erm, south Birmingham.

However, as I'm still thinking about what to write, you'll have to wait a bit...anyway, in the meantime, have a look at our photo album, and feel free to offer any feedback in the comments boxes.